I am an artist.

That is what I am, and that is what I do. Because of that, I draw. Because of that, I exist. How dare I become complacent? How dare I let this fall into habit and live simply to get by, homework to homework? How dare I forget the passion that led me here in the first place?!

From this day on, daily sketches resume. No more bullshit excuses. No more fear of toil and burnout, because that is part of the natural struggle in life. I eat and sleep every day; so will I draw.

Happy birthday (in Asia time), Saga and Kanon. I live to breathe life into you.


(And, thank you, Tomas. It was the greatest thing in the world to meet you.)

A new oekaki board

Try me.

Fujou is gone, Skylands is gone, and fearsome is slower than a crawl. Oekaki seems to be a thing of 2003. Yet...now, in this age, I have a board. In beta, yes, with limited features, yes, seemingly without even basic options such as changing board-wide template, yes. But...

I wonder.

[365-86]

Way to choke already on only the second day, Jing.

[365-85] 30 brothers theme challenge

01. Clothing swap

Please trust me on this one, Nii-san, that's not how you put it on...

...

[365-84]

Had a rare opportunity today of sitting idly under a tree for 1.5 hr, 80% sheltered from steady rain by luckily-thick foliage. Covered the park bench with rows of Es A Gee A with random splashes of Kay A En O En laced in between, written in rain.

It got me back to thinking in imagery again.

But I'm such an amateur still struggling trying to figure out how even basic functions work. For instance, WHY IS IT DOING THAT THING WHERE IT PANS LEFT FOR A SECOND WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

[365-83]

Quick study.

[365-82]

Because if even Shura himself doesn't look right with his hair, something is severely wrong. And I don't have enough time to do what I want to do, as per usual.

[365-81]

Still nowhere near the positive side of the spectrum, but looks like yesterday was a definitive rock-bottom, meaning the only direction possible today was...up. "Better."

[365-80] Vanitas

Inevitable, when something so looked-forward-to comes to pass without a beat of pause. Especially so when people long missed return for just one day of celebration, and then disappear again without a trace as soon as the clock strikes twelve. Even if, here, it is still the 30th...in Asia it is done.

I have never been good at partings. Why did I open myself up ripe for this known vulnerability?

The only thing that remains is love, love thicker than blood, love that gathered us to meet in the first place.




Who are these people?

How did they come to mean the world to me?

Who am I?

Even touching the pen was an immense struggle today. Why do I do this? All I remember is a promise. Even if...

I love you with all the living force of my existence.



Happy birthday.

[365-79] 2013.05.30

If you go

I'll be there

[365-78]

Quick eyes.

[365-77]

Depth and value practice.

[365-76] That's gross, grandma

[365-75] .....

Random game of throwing BB into your typical spring/summer clothes. I died before I could finish.

[365-74] Hair Exchange n

Taking things easy since endlessly admiring the last one is still eating up a chunk of my time. WHY IS IT NOT THE 30TH YET SO I CAN SHARE THIS BABY ALREADY I WANT THE WORLD TO BASK WITH ME

Unrelatedly, bought a 3DS XL and Zero Escape just came in today. ふふふふふ。。。

[365-73] Final adjustments

Minor, but still kind of critical I guess. Also I fell asleep.

[365-72] I'm...finished?

WTF it got done so ahead of schedule I don't even know what to make of this. Anyway, holding off on releasing the full image until 5.30 rolls around... This is probably a very wise move that I had never previously given myself the chance to make. Usually I'm mass-publishing on all outlets as soon as I catch the first hint of feel that it's done.

[365-71]

There are surprisingly many CGI scar references online for wounds inflicted by all kinds of weapons. Unbelievably helpful, but need to figure out how to make it look more...natural?

[365-70] Burn

"Kyo was hospitalized on 5/13 for a fever caused by tonsillitis. Doctors issued him bed rest, but he insisted on performing at the 5/16 show while running a 104° fever, sustained by IVs. He was drifting in and out of delirium throughout performance, yet stood against staff's intervention to cut the live short. He was holding on by sheer willpower and finally passed out right after the show's end. Kyo was once again rushed to the ER and this time, doctors mandated that he absolutely must get rest. The tour's next show on 5/24 is therefore postponed." (translated from source)

Please. We love you. Stop.
Even if you are the type to think life is meaningless if you ever do stop. Even if you...

We love you.

-

Abs are difficult and this is majorly embarrassing. That torso needs to be so beautiful that people cease to notice missing arms.

[365-69]

So many anatomy kinks to iron out it's almost painful. Kanon's face is my only support in pushing forward.